Friday, October 26, 2007
WALK HOLY
Thursday, October 18, 2007
FICTIONAL TALE
In years gone by I’ve come to observe that first impression does really count and that sometimes you might have to bend over backwards to erase an unwanted notion that someone has about you.
For me bending over backwards to erase an unwanted notion would have been relatively easy except that whenever I have an opportunity to do so, I don’t do particularly well. In fact, instead, my behavior tends to reinforce whatever notion the person(s) have of me in the first place.
How this happens is still a mystery and I have found myself pleading with people to think positive about me because in that way they will also reap the benefits… as I will almost always tend to act positively towards them.
The above however does not infringe on my personality or my character and does not in anyway define who I am.
A while ago, I met a friend who thinks I am very selfish. By coincidence and chance, I wasn’t able to give what was being asked of me and like always I felt really bad because I wasn’t able to help. To top it up, the friend decided to believe what he thought. I explained the situation with a guarantee that I am not selfish and that next time will be different.
Not long after that, next time came…. And alas!!!! Here I went again, giving excuses about how I won’t be able to give what he’s asking. Without mincing words, he remarked “I knew you are selfish”
Here we go…my fictional tale replaying itself again… and there’s nothing I could do to redeem myself than to pray than he’ll encounter me on a day where the truth about me will be revealed.
For your information, I am not selfish
Why I am saying this?
In a few days time, I’ll be facing a group of people who by virtue of relationship and rules of engagement have no choice but to think positively about me, but I also know that by virtue of experience, they might be tempted to think otherwise.
Admittedly, I haven’t been particularly brilliant in the way I portray myself. It is not because I was doing something wrong, rather, I was living a life of ambiguity where whether I was in or out could not be ascertained.
Over the course of the months of preparation and being in the group, there was a relaxation about what they had thought of me…..but I guess their fears will not be completely wiped out until after a specified day had come and gone….The D-DAY.
As the day approached, hopes were raised, excitement filled the tent and on the eve of the D-Day, I was a sure member and a significant participant in the activities of the group.
As the D-Day dawns, my fictional tale materialized…. AGAIN…..
Characterized by a few wrong decisions, unprecedented happenings, bizarre time mistakes and my journey to a location where I was unreachable all culminating in me doing a NO-SHOW for what is arguable the most important day on the calendar for the group.
20 missed calls, uncountable text and voice messages were all deposited on my phone and 4hrs after the group event… I showed up albeit not physically…. but rather with access to my phone… and that’s when it dawned on me… “Nine months of hard work fizzled out …. .and the group’s fear?..... Confirmed!!!!
From my personal point of view, I was distraught for missing an event I’ve looked forward to all year long…. I wanted to be there… dreamt about it… the accolades, the applause, invited loads of friends…. Only for the friends to also join in the search for the act they’ve come to see.
My sorrows were compounded when the group leader spoke to me on the phone and highlighted how unprofessional my actions have been, letting the group down by my inconsiderate approach to the demands of the group (paraphrased).
I admit without holding back that I was at fault…..and my actions were disappointing.. But a part of me still thinks that the group’s notion about me triggered it. If they had been very positive, probably their thought process could have helped me do the right things.
It’s been almost 5 months now since the spectacle. Five months of silence, noticeably from my side. As mentioned earlier, in a few days … I will make a return with the aim to defy the odds…. Bring an end to the fictional tale and thrust myself into the front line of activities. A warm welcome I pray I’ll receive.
CAUTION:
The fictional Tale has no bearing on who I am, and I take full responsibility for my actions and words …. Another man’s thoughts are too small to mould the way I live my life.
Although, to see life as blue, always wear a blue Polaroid is the answer (and everything turns blue)… so if anyone decides to see me as black…. Oh well…. I might just be black… to them.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Principle, Value and Faith
Principles give you stability in a day to day environment. It helps define who you are… and helps confirm who you are not (in the long term). Yes, sometimes principles are challenged and sometimes you might not be able to live up to them… other times being principled can be detrimental to progress (but that’s because the world we live in does not understand them)
But overall it’s good to be principled ‘cos for the least, it saves you the drama of yo-yoing around like a headless chicken.
Values project you to a state of moral uprightness that helps you survive in a world where everything and anything has equal chances of happening.
Will the Diana inquest provide answers to the pressing questions? … Was it or was it not planned?
An 11 year old who has terrorized his community with top of the range anti-social behaviour cannot be jailed…..Because he’s less than 12 years of age.
My loved TV star… Kiefer Sutherland who plays counter terrorist agent (Jack Bauer) in the hit TV series 24 is facing 48 days in jail… for drink driving….
Can anyone see values missing?
It surely feels good to utter the words;
“Family comes first” when you are faced with a choice involving your family.
“Work is a means to an end not an end in itself” when you are increasingly nursing a discontent with your purpose in life (to work or to live)…
“Charity begins at home” when your kids forget to act it out (Thank you, please, I’m sorry)….the magic words.
“I’m a man of integrity”…. When you are asked to play it fast…. Or cut corners.
You can put your hand up and say “my middle name is not Alonso”….. and if your first name is Alonso…. Ooooops ….. ma bad…. At least you are not a formula 1 driver.
Faith brings principles and values to a place of co-existence where the next day is an opportunity taken… not because you’ve seen it….but because you’ve lived it.
Faith tells our fears to have principles and our worries to have values….
If fear has principles like we do… we’ll respect each other and if worry has values like we do…. We’ll respect each other…..
Then I can say “Evil I will not fear… for I have the fear of God”…. Principled fear
And about my existence I will not worry…. Cos worry has values… and that is…..don’t come near me….
So everyday,
LIVE PRINCIPLED, LIVE VALUED, LIVE FAITHFUL......
Thursday, October 04, 2007
HELLO
It’s absolutely fantastic to be back stretching my hands out and hoping my fingers will touch you (of different race, background, location, class, identity and mindset) through the workings of the World Wide Web network.
It’s been a few weeks now and quite sincerely; a lot has changed since we finished the journey on the last series titled “Family Meltdown…The Mis-es”.
Firstly, I’ve grown taller, (even if that is just as a result of an increase in my hair length), but more significantly, I’m embarking on the final lap of an hurdle in my life and come June….. By God’s grace I’ll be done.
There is another introduction to the content of my blog page which is show-cased as “Quote of the day”….. This will be a quote mostly from my library or occasionally from other people that will minister to you for the day.
Christmas is coming and before then, we’ll surely find a host of things to occupy ourselves with.
Welcome back to myself…. And welcome back to you too.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
FINAL WORDS!!!!!!!
In those 8 weeks, I posted about the now thought provoking concepts… “The Mis-es”
Each of the “Mis-es is listed below in the order in which they were unveiled.
MIS-INTERPRETATION
MISCREANT
MISCONCEPTION
MISQUOTATION
MISREPRESENTATION
MISAPPLICATION
MISUNDERSTANDING
If you missed any of the posts… you can always go back and learn about the things that can ultimately bring a halt to the progress of your families.
To draw the curtain on this series: “FAMILY MELTDOWN - THE MIS-ES ”, I’ll like to share a poem with you. The poem talks about the persistence of our differences…. yet elaborates on the insistence of our dependencies……
Family
Far and wide we’re scattered abroad
Playing our life games on different boards
Still we live in the same world
Crossing each other’s path like a cross-word
“We grew up together”------ probably not!!!
“We have the same father” ----- probably not!!!
“We’re from the same mother” ------ probably not!!!
“We look like each other” ------ probably not!!!
So you ask:
“What have we got in common”,
Seeing we’re very random?
And I say:
It’s a life full of passion,
Love, commitment, help and fusion.
It’s the world’s latest fashion,
And it’s time you join in the action
‘Cos we’re a family
Your Family
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
MISUNDERSTANDING
This is the most referred to of all the Mis-es.
Why this is so might not be very obvious, but what I can tell you is … all the Mis-es head in one direction…..the direction of confusion.
It doesn’t matter whether you misinterpret, misrepresent, misquote, misunderstand or misapply things….. After all is said and done, communication breakdown is the overall effect that the Mis-es want to achieve in our families.
FACTS ABOUT UNDERSTANDING
The pinnacle of human intelligence is “understanding”.
When you understand something, what you are saying is, I know the intricacies of this thing and I can reproduce it whenever I am required to.
Back in the days in high school, my teachers explain to me that…. The easiest way to be a genius is not just to learn or read whatever I’m being taught but to UNDERSTAND them.
When you understand things, they become engraved into your system… when you understand, you care less about unimportant things.
When you understand life… you know the things that make life tick…. When you understand your career… you become a force to reckon with… When you understand your family… everyday becomes a journey towards “betterment” and not “what ifs.”
I can go on and on about the usefulness of reaching that state of understanding because:
“Understanding is the state where the word “ease” finds fulfillment and becomes a lifestyle”
Proverbs 4 vs. 7
Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.
A few days ago, I was on the phone to a very good friend and after a while, the conversation turned bittersweet. With every passing second, it seems the only thing I was doing was causing her pain. For the first time in a while, I was disappointed at the way the conversations had turned out and I only have myself to blame.
With no clue on how to make things better, I decided going off the phone was my best option so as not to cause any more pain. After a few minutes of getting my senses together, my good friend text me saying:
“You make it sound like I don’t understand what you meant to say. I know you didn’t mean no harm……..I personally believe you wouldn’t……hurt me”.
In other words, my friend is saying the understanding she has of me is potent enough to wipe out my mistakes…
THE STRENGTH OF UNDERSTANDING
How strong can “understanding” be?
What potential is resident in us understanding each other?
A journey into time will I believe reveal the possible possibilities.
Genesis 11 vs. 1 – 9 (The Message)
"God Turned Their Language into 'Babble'"
At one time, the whole Earth spoke the same language. It so happened that as they moved out of the east, they came upon a plain in the land of Shinar and settled down.
They said to one another, "Come, let's make bricks and fire them well." They used brick for stone and tar for mortar.
Then they said, "Come, let's build ourselves a city and a tower that reaches Heaven. Let's make ourselves famous so we won't be scattered here and there across the Earth."
God came down to look over the city and the tower those people had built.
God took one look and said, "One people, one language; why, this is only a first step. No telling what they'll come up with next—they'll stop at nothing! Come, we'll go down and garble their speech so they won't understand each other." Then God scattered them from there all over the world. And they had to quit building the city. That's how it came to be called Babel, because there God turned their language into "babble." From there God scattered them all over the world.
Understanding was so powerful that at that time even God was disturbed.
CALAMITIES OF MISUNDERSTANDING
For clarification purposes, I’ll like to point out that the opposite of understanding IS NOT misunderstanding.
As from the definition, Misunderstanding is simply “wrong understanding”.
The subtleness of Misunderstanding makes it one of the most dangerous of the Mis-es.
“You know that you know what you know…. What you don’t know is that what you know is not the right thing to know.”
Why did the builders stop building?....... It wouldn’t have been just because one was speaking English and the other Spanish….rather....
All of a sudden, the gesture that should generally mean “thumbs up” now turns out to be a “swear word” to another.
Misunderstanding brought confusion and in no time progress came to a halt.
The Mis-es are so powerful that God employed the services to destroy a family….. A national family.
The enemy will also not decline to use these things to destroy our God given families.
We will be an ignorant bunch of believers and individuals to think that these concepts are nothing but English terms.
Luke 11 vs. 17
Jesus said:
“Any kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and a house divided against itself will fall.”
A WAY OUT
As found in former posts and running through the veins of this series, the following are the core lessons to be learnt and implemented in our daily existence.
v Awareness: Be aware that the Mis-es exist and are potent enough to destroy
v Be Open: Clarify your thoughts and actions to family members. Let people know who you are
v Harmony: Be an ambassador of harmony. Seek peace with all men.
v Tolerance: Give family members the benefit of doubt and learn to tolerate others
NEXT WEEK!!! - FINAL WORDS
Thursday, August 09, 2007
MISAPPLICATION
IT is to use with the wrong purpose or in a wrong way.
Use and misuse are two ever present routes anytime an application is involved. So we realise that when we are equipped, the next major step is to know how to apply what we have been equipped with.
You’ve just been promoted at work, and now you think the time has come for your newly found authority to deliver to you everything you want…..good or bad.
That long awaited freedom is now yours ….you can do what you want, where you want, when you want and how you want…. Please don’t forget, freedom carries “FREE DOOM”
In our quest to have an afterlife, is blowing our selves up the way to go? (Terrorists claimed)
AND
“Cast your bread upon many waters”…folks…has little to do with feeding the fishes.
The life in this heart cry (“Family Meltdown…The Mis-es) is to create a new sense of familiarity within our families, the feeling of belonging, and mutual respect in achieving a corporate goal.
We all withdraw to places to get equipped….. school, religious centres, seminars, hobbies, etc… After a magnificent round of 64 on a golf course, the last thing we would expect for your driver is a human victim.
Do we seriously take the time out to ask
“Am I misapplying this thing that I’m equipped with?”…….
If we don’t, I think it’s high time we started doing the same. You might just be….
Thursday, August 02, 2007
MISREPRESENTATION
From a lay man point of view, misrepresentation means to give a false or misleading account of something.
A quick look at the word as put forward by lexicographers gave synonyms like to “distort”, “falsify”, or “belie” i.e. share the sense of presenting information in a way that does not accord with the truth.
To misrepresent usually involves a deliberate intention to deceive either for profit or advantage
To distort implies a purposeful twisting or emphasizing of certain statements so as to produce an inaccurate or misleading impression.
However, my best definition of misrepresentation is a
“Willful perversion of facts” – wordNet.
I have in time past willfully distorted facts because I was trying to save myself from what I perceived will be a big smack from dad.
I have also in time past misrepresented situations so I could get what I want.
I know people who have done likewise to get other people into trouble.
My question to you is:
Have you ever been misrepresented?
Have you ever misrepresented someone else?
Have you ever perverted the cause of justice to save a family member?
Have you ever perverted the cause of justice to bring about the downfall of a family member? (Work colleague, friend, sibling etc.)
Whizzing through the pages of the bible, a story came to life that depicts misrepresentation in a hilarious way.
“There was a couple named Abraham and Sarah, and Sarah was a chick (I mean HOT)…as in pretty. Abraham knows this as well and on one of their travels to a different city, he did something rather deceptive.
He told the people of the city that Sarah was his sister because he feared that if they knew Sarah was his wife, they would kill him and take her.
FACT: Sarah was actually Abraham’s sister but it was a very distant connection…. So technically he was telling the truth.
More often that not, fear is a major ingredient in us misrepresenting someone or a situation. We get scared of the consequences of telling the truth and this brings me to a simpler definition of misrepresentation.
“Misrepresentation is simply telling a lie or making someone believe in a lie without you actually telling the lie”
Consider this event:
In my back pocket lies my wallet….a timberland one if you care to know. In my wallet lies a combination of things notably $20 and $50 notes (yeah I’m rich if you are wondering).
A friend came over and asked “do you have $10 on you?”
My answer was a resounding but sympathetic “NO” and he walked away believing that I was telling the truth.
In that event, did I lie? .... Well, I don’t think so. Surely, I did not have $10 on me, but I had $20 and $50 notes which are more than but not $10.
What I have done was misrepresented my lack of money and tried to make him believe it.
In the age of increased media hype and paparazzi, we are at constant risk from the influence of false accounts and events. Most times, these falsifications are conscious, deliberate and done to inflict pain or just for the general public to have a laugh.
A few weeks ago, the Queen became a victim of a media stunt that misrepresented the sequence of events in a television documentary. A statement from the BBC reads
The BBC said: "In this trailer there is a sequence that implies that the Queen left a sitting prematurely. This was not the case and the actual sequence of events was mis-represented. 12.07.2007 16:52 www.bbc.co.uk
It’s not surprising that a few days ago, an order came from the royal banning the airing of the documentary…..
Unfortunately, misrepresentation can be done for good and bad reasons, so the ultimate decision lays with you……the reader of this piece.
My advice:
“Love your neighbour as yourself” and remember your neighbours are the members of your families.
“A lie said enough becomes the truth” ….. It’s a great invention (turning lies into truth)…. Don’t be part of it.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
MISQUOTATION
Quotation is simply a person's exact words as repeated by another person.
Misquotation then is an instance or occasion where a person's exact words (oral or written) are not accurately repeated.
In our society, the mainstream relies on the wings of misquotation to transport various messages to carefree, careless and thoughtless recipients like you and I.
Many tabloids, people and reporters have been in one lawsuit or the other due to the different degrees of misquotation going on.
One thing that stays true is that there could be a very high price to pay if you are found guilty of misquoting someone.
My question is “why is there a relatively high punishment attached to the sin of misquotation”?
THE REASON:
“There are very few things that can “kill” faster than the words of your mouth. Therefore, if I can make people believe that you said something which you may or may not have said, then I am equally able to kill you as fast as your words can kill you.”
There are rules at every level of the society that governs the use and misuse of quotations.
In universities, it is put under the umbrella of plagiarism and could have consequences as weighty as expulsion.
In the work place, you can get the sack and in the mainstream, it could have huge financial consequences.
THE DRILL
Misquotation occurs primarily and acceptably in one way ……by "omission". If you do it any other way (by addition), you are simply heading for trouble. I’m sure you wouldn’t be stupid enough to add to what someone has said unless you know it is harmless or that you wouldn’t be found out.
The laws binding the words of anyone is very strong, but deceit and lies are things that has taken us humans captive and though they destroy our families, we still fervently pursue a life immersed in deception.
SIMPLICITY
It is very surprising that one of the things we learn at a very early age is an exposure to the effects that misquotation can have.
As kids growing up, a major prototype of misquotation that we were exposed to came in the vintage game “Chinese whispers”.
A chosen individual starts the game by whispering a sentence into the ears of another person. The receiver passes on what he or she has heard to the next person and so on. By the time the sentence gets back to the starter, it is observed that the content of the sentence would have changed dramatically. That is misquotation in its harmless form.
This simple phenomenon has caused the downfall of many families.
A few weeks ago, I was on the train hopping between two cities when I met a gentle man called Matt. We got into conversation and I proudly told him about what I am doing with my life and my time. Over the course of the almost 2hr long journey, Matt told me about how he almost lost his best friend to a deadly strain of this killer concept “MISQUOTATION”. For a period of 6 years, there was no contact between the two and it all started when
http://www.waynecounty.com/coalitiontochangetheculture/imgs/conflict.jpg
“someone said the best friend said something about Mat which had devastating effects”.
Matt in ignorance believed the story, reacted to the story and after 6 years of hurt, pain and brokenness, Matt found out that his best friend had been misquoted. Now they are back together, their friendship even stronger.
However, not every story of this sort has a wonderful ending like Matts. The consequences of misquotation can be severe, damaging and irrecoverable.
WHY DO WE STILL DO IT?
Every major work has suffered from the bites of misquotation: religious books, the Bible, individuals, Shakespeare etc. to name a few and you are not an exception.
“You said….You didn’t say”…. “I didn’t say, but I said”….. “That’s not all I said, you only heard the first part”….
These are things we sure must have uttered at the times when misquotation is taking its toll on us.
Misquotation may not be intentional as in some cases; therefore as we’ve learnt in past lessons, TOLERANCE becomes an important value for family members to have.
You will not intentionally misquote someone if you are
Living a life that seeks peace
An ambassador of harmony
Loving and caring
So, deliberate misquotation is an identifier of a trouble maker.
In the words of this series………..
Misquotation is an instrument of a Miscreant…. Don’t be caught with it.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
MISCONCEPTION
Simply put, misconception is a mistaken ideology.
In our day to day existence, misconception is not so much of an issue. Our society has been carefully set up in such a way that what you end up knowing is what the society wants you to know.
The education system, company’s training schemes; family values and upbringing etc, all contribute to ensuring that we do not have the wrong conceptions about the things that matter in life.
Recently, its was concluded that the celebrity craze and all its baggage is resulting in vulnerable members of the society having a misconception of what true beauty or even healthy living is all about. People don’t want to be overweight; hence, they live so healthy that they become underweight. (Misconception)
With a big twist of this tale however, the misconception in our society that grips my heart is that which defines as false the existence of God.

(Psalms 14 vs. 1)
“The fool says in his heart there is no God…..”
I would like to make it clear that being a “fool” in this context is not necessarily related to being stupid or acting in a stupid way. I am talking about
“A person lacking in good sense of judgement….”
-Advanced learners English dictionary
A few years ago a group of lovely children raised their opinion about how they will not hesitate to call someone a fool if the person “says (mouth)” “there is no God”. I remember telling them the dangers of calling someone a fool and how it’s not very christianly.
Matthew 5 vs. 21- 22
“…… I'm telling you that anyone who……… Thoughtlessly yell 'stupid!'(Fool) at a brother or sister…… is on the brink of hellfire. The simple moral fact is that words kill.”…… (Paraphrased) (THE MESSAGE)
“A fool says in his “HEART”….. It is not just from the mouth or may never be from the mouth…… it is from the heart. The fool lives the unbelief.
Anything from the heart is reflected by every part of your body be it the blood that is pumped from the heart…love…. or hatred….and so is unbelief. You’ll live it if you have it.
Later on in the scriptures, the bible now explained the distinction between being foolish and being wise, the result of the right conception.
Hebrew 11 vs. 6
“If a person does not believe God, he cannot please him. Anyone who comes to God must believe that God is real. And he must believe that God will bless those who try to find him. God will reward a person, if he really tries to find God.”
- (Worldwide English)
We have two things fighting when it comes to misconception. We believe that God exists in the world and in the word (bible), but we do not believe that God exists in our lives. We believe that God is still preoccupied with the management of times and seasons (rain, sunshine…. Etc….)
Psalm 94 vs. 7 - 11
They think, "God isn't looking, Jacob's God is out to lunch." Well, think again, you idiots, fools
How long before you get smart? Do you think Ear-Maker doesn't hear?
Eye-Shaper doesn't see?
Do you think the trainer of nations doesn't correct, the teacher of Adam doesn't know?
God knows, all right— knows your stupidity, sees your shallowness. (The Message)
Listen, the work of creation was finished on the day of creation, what is yet to be done is what you will do with your life.
Acts 17 vs. 22 – 30 (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=acts%2017:22-30;&version=45;)
We don’t know who is saying in their heart that there is no God, so how can we identify them.
2 timothy 3 vs 9 …… their folly will be clear to everyone.
“Your conviction determines your conduct and your confession in the state of your confusion is a conclusion of your condition… folks, we’re talking about MISCONCEPTION.”
When you believe that God “is”…..It
ü Gives you an elevated view of mankind. (Gen 126, psalm 81- 9)
ü Causes you to treat others nicely (I Corinth 1111 - 12, Philippians 23-5,Matthew 712)
ü Gives a sense of purpose to your existence (1Peter 29)
And finally, believing that God “is” puts joy in living and takes fear out of dying ….The result of the right conception.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
MISCREANT
Miscreant
“Be not deceived evil Communication corrupts good manners” (1corinthians 15 vs. 33)
A miscreant is simply a wrong doer. A person without moral scruples i.e. they do not have any moral principles guiding their thoughts or actions.
Saddam Hussein was portrayed as a miscreant in the world family and it led to why military action was taken against him.
At different points in family units, we could almost always sense that some people fit this description. All they care about is themselves, they do not follow laid down rules, and they do not think hard enough that their actions could lead to “Family meltdown”.
A story from the good book of life (the bible) will help explain the effects miscreants can have on a family…..even a family as big as a nation. .
This story is about a man named Achan the son of Carmi, the son of Zabdi, the son of Zerah of the tribe of Judah.
It came about when the people of Israel went to take over the city of Jericho.
The city of Jericho was recorded as a fortified city with good military strength. The highlight of Jericho’s military capability was resident in the strength of the city wall.
The story of the destruction of Jericho and the collapse of the wall can be found in the bible in the book of Joshua chapters 6 and 7.
God played a major role in the Israelite’s victory by giving them instructions on what to do to bring the walls down. But those were not the only instructions; He also told the Israelites to utterly destroy the city and MUST not take any spoils for themselves. All the spoils must be given to God i.e. taken to God’s house.
The Israelites conquered Jericho, celebrated and decided to move on to the next city that will be conquered. This next city by the name Ai was smaller, less powerful and of no significant threat to the Israelites, so we say….a piece of cake for the Israelites. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the case. Fresh from conquering Jericho, the Israelites were defeated by this small city and it raised concerns and a lot of questions.
What went wrong?
In this type of situation, the Israelites will consult God to get answers and so they did. God answered and told the Israelites that they have broken his commandment. Someone in the Israeli camp had taken spoils for themselves and God was upset about it. Achan the culprit was found out and he was punished for his offence.
The Israelite army went back to Ai after dealing with the Miscreant in the camp, and they were back to winning ways.
Remember, the wining ways was not in a chess or football game. Achan’s sin (disobedience) caused the death of 36 Israeli soldiers in their first attack against the small city of Ai and these Soldier’s lives cannot be brought back.
Characteristics of a miscreant
v The go their own way instead of tried and tested ways
v They are disobedient
v They have their own agenda instead of a corporate one
v They live double lives (Hypocrites)
v They have a form of godliness but deny its power
v They are always learning, but never know the truth. They learn to argue.
Miscreants are in widespread existence in our families. We find our families at the mercy of these types of individuals and taking a laid back approach will almost mean we have resigned ourselves to defeat.
How does this affect you?
Your beloved family could soon be destroyed e.g. national family
You can be a victim of the consequences of someone else’s wrong doing (the dead soldiers). Achan himself did not die in the battle.
Your hard work could be of no productive significance or use e.g. if there is a miscreant at your work place.
You stand the risk of being convinced to become a miscreant
Lines of action!!!
Report to proper authorities concerning the activities of a miscreant. If your sibling is constantly punching the television set, and you decided not say anything significant about it, it might not take long before the whole family experiences life without a TV. Telling your parents could land him/her in trouble, but it would have resulted in a better outcome.
Likewise, if your colleague at work is constantly following the wrong procedures, you might excuse yourself as not being the manager, but don’t be surprised if you all become jobless as a result of those wrong procedures.
United we stand, divided we fall…. Seek unity among the family units that you belong to.
A chain is only as strong as its weakest link. So no matter how hard you’ve worked or tried, a miscreant in your family means failure might not be as far away as you think.
Lets all make it our responsibility to look after each other….. The presence of a suicide bomber in a busy market means the market is as safe as the bomber blowing up.
Now do you care??? I think you should.
NEXT WEEK!!!! WHO IS A FOOL?........ Stay Paged
Thursday, July 05, 2007
MIS-INTERPRETATION
well, the time has come and the first "mis" is unveiled below.. Welcome
MISINTERPRETATION
Misinterpretation is a “miss” that accompanies the word interpret in causing confusion in our families.
From the Oxford University dictionary, to interpret means:
A) “To decide that something/somebody has a particular meaning and to understand it in this way”
The upgrade to that definition is given by the American Heritage dictionary
“To present or conceptualize the meaning of……” the decision (as in “A” above)
Misinterpretation then is when you get that decision, meaning and the presentation wrong.
To wrongful translate orally or in languages the words, actions and ideas of a creator.
It is also a false processed response to an idea, oral or written data that has been taken in.
Everyday, we find ourselves with the task of interpreting information that comes our way so we can act on them. Be it your baby crying, your spouse kissing you (home family), your teacher teaching you (school family), your boss allocating a new project (work family) or even a stranger raising their middle finger at you (societal family).
Every reaction you put forward is supporting the decision you have made concerning interpretation.
If someone slaps you real hard, your interpretation of that slap will determine how you’ll react, either with a frown (if you deserve the slap), a return slap (if your pride is on the line) or a groan of satisfaction (as in a sexual environment).
Misinterpretation will occur if as in a sexual environment, you respond to the slap by beating up whoever that slapped you.
If you get the decision wrong… no matter how truthful and well meaning you are, your processed response will always be wrong. An upgrade to the consequence occurs when you present the wrong response to others to run with. A chain of wrong responses will erupt and in no time, the family will be in crisis.
Misinterpretation can be grouped under these three broad headings:
Ignorant misinterpretation
Deliberate misinterpretation
System misinterpretation
Ignorant misinterpretation: This is caused by the narrowness in the availability of options for the interpreter. The interpreter has got the decision wrong because they do not have the capability to digest, analyse and grasp “correctly” the data (action, words or writing) being passed on to them. In other words, they don’t know better.
Deliberate misinterpretation: This is a result of the revelation of the contents of the mind of the interpreter. The interpreter has got the decision wrong because he/she purposely wants to cause trouble, harm or inflict pain.
System misinterpretation: This is the most common form of misinterpretation and it combines ignorance and deliberate forms of interpretation.
System misinterpretation is connected to every aspect of our lives. Each person’s decision is sourced from their pool of knowledge. This pool of knowledge encompasses academic education, moral education, experience, societal influence, mindset configuration etc.
So you’ll find that a good person makes a good interpreter and a bad person makes a bad interpreter.
The content of your interpretation will stem from the vocabulary stored in your system. So, if you have a good (positive) mindset, your interpretations of words and actions will be from a good database and will almost always turn out good but if you have a bad (negative) mindset, then without doubt, your interpretation of words and actions will almost always turn out bad irrespective of what you take in.
I have met a few people in life that will not take gifts because in their minds, they are always certain that the giver is trying to be cunning and only giving because the giver would want something greater in return at another day.
This thought line could be true in some cases, but not in all cases.
Your knowledge base is a major determinant of the correctness of your interpretation.
Misinterpretation wrecks havoc in our families simply because ideas and talks are passed around based on the interpreter.
2Timothy 2 vs. 2
And the [instructions] which you have heard from me along with many witnesses, transmit and entrust [as a deposit] to reliable and faithful men who will be competent and qualified to teach others also.
In our families, it is good practise to ensure that for every unsure recipient, we make sure that messages are passed on with drivers.
We understand that computers need drivers or else their interpreted responses will be wrong, useless and misleading. Likewise, for every recipient that is not on the same level as you, please provide your messages with drivers.
How do you do this?
v Recognise the difference in “knowledge base” in the family
v Be conscious of the possibility of misinterpretation in the family
v Clarify your thoughts and messages. (word, actions and writings)
v Pursue harmony in the family and stay faithful
v Give the people around you the benefit of doubt
The easiest aspect of misinterpretation to miss is an interpretation of actions. Watch out for those winks and “evil eyes”…. They may just be the person’s natural condition…..and not passing any message across or having any meaning to it. (lol)
Thank you for starting this journey with me. Hope to see you next week as I pick up another “Mis” in the series to ensure that we learn the things that causes our families to go amiss.
Hint for next week: Always learning, but never know the truth… they learn to argue…. YES, it is another “Mis”
Stay paged.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
FAMILY MELTDOWN - THE MIS-ES
The definition of a family from most dictionary spans the whole of the entire academia from historical definition to biological definition to financial definition. A few of those definitions include
- An association of people who share common beliefs or activities; - WordNet
- A fundamental social group in society typically consisting of one or two parents and their children. - American Heritage Dictionary
- A group of persons sharing common ancestry. - American Heritage Dictionary
- The staff or body of assistants, of an official: the office family - Dictionary.com
In the course of the next 7 – 8 weeks I’ll be using the following definition of a family which I believe encompasses all relational attachments that exists on our planet.
“A family is a group of people who may or may not be blood relations but who also share common interests, attitudes and goals.”
So the next time you are about to enter the train: remember the people standing next to you, they are your family… You share the common goal of taking a journey.
The next time you see someone random on the street, also remember they are your family; you share the common interest of surviving on this planet.
At home, at work, in school, all around you are different members of the different families that you belong to…… be nice to them
Why so much fuss about families?
Experience tells me and confirms that families are the building blocks of the society. Every good thing gets distributed via the most efficient distribution chain in existence – “The Family”. It is not surprising then, that your “Family name” is still a relevant identifier of who you are.
Likewise, an efficient way of destroying a society is to fiddle around with family units and with time, the cracks in the building blocks (family) will start making their way to the surface.
The next seven weeks on this page are for people that want a change…… (Echoing the words of our new family oriented Prime Minister Gordon Brown)
v If you want to contribute to the growth and survival of your family units
v If you want to identify what went wrong and where in your family units
v If you want to learn better ways of coping with your family members
This series is for you.
Come as I identify known but easily ignored contributors to family collapse.
Come with an open mind, suggestions, experiences and a heart to change and effect change in your respective families.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you “FAMILY MELTDOWN – THE MIS-ES” ………Every Thursday.
STAY PAGED
Friday, June 15, 2007
FATHERHOOD
“My father has many children” can be a painful thing to say if your share of inheritance is under fire.
The role of the father in the society is increasingly terrorised by the extremists that lies in the fathers to be.
Not long ago was the passion evident in fathers to see their sons and daughters grow and excel in their chosen careers and path in life. This also to be noted is a far cry from the days of imposition, where fathers supposedly chart out their children’s life for them. These kids are treated like machines built to receive orders from their physical creator and disobedience can have grave consequences. This power hold even sometimes results in fathers destroying these machines (their children) and a good name has been developed in the English language to define this act…. “Honour Killing”…. When a father kills a child because the child is not obeying or complying to the father’s wishes. (Don’t be fooled by the positive name though… if the father gets caught, he’ll end up in jail…. No doubt about that)
However, a more subtle but predominant act is an “honour killing” of the mind. Where the father still kills the child, though the child is still alive …. We say…dead children walking”.
Nowadays, we’ve been transported from the icy cold Antarctica to the burning hot deserts in terms of parenting and “father care”.
The new era as expected is service oriented, technologically advanced with an increased sense of awareness that tends to lead to productivity. In fact masculine superheroes have been resurrected to cement the cracks in the parenting desert. Fathers for Justice or fathers for money, which ever name they choose to answer to have recently been in our faces on TV. I once thought it as a new programme transmitted from the roof of Westminster until Trevor explains the mystery correspondent as a fighter doing his own part in a division of labour agenda.
With any era, division of labour s always a constant and effective choice in job allocation for so many reasons such as ease of working, enhanced security and it also gives room for expertise to mention a few. It is not surprising then, that the same has been employed in the “father care” firm. The potency of division of labour cannot be underestimated, but will it produce results? ...yes it will produce results… good or bad ones? ....hhhhmmm
How does it work?
Firstly, a potential father hooks up with a potential mother, only for her to get pregnant in most cases by the same man or sometimes by another man. Considering also that an average relationship n the UK lasts only a few years, the child is barely old enough before another man takes the responsibility of being a step dad. In the long run, the child grows with so many fathers or with no fathers at all depending on the effectiveness of how the “jobs” (responsibilities) were allocated by the circumstances.
The zenith of this hierarchy reaches a boiling point when a mystery father, in order to find his look alike (probably not facially but intellectually or entrepreneur wise) gathers up children that are not his, sets them a on a wide range of tasks and eventually picks his favourite, offering him or her a good share of his fortune…. another man’s child.
(Apprentice viewers……you feel me?)
The father’s day as innocent as it is does not know the difficulties being faced by the descendants of the older generations (meaning us) in choosing our fathers. Some of us embrace our circumstances and acknowledge all these fathers, some of us detest what our lives have turned into because there were too many fathers…. Some of us didn’t get a chance to have one let alone many fathers. I stand to tell you…. These are illusions that tend to remind you of the imperfections in life …… but viewed closely, the truth is “we all have many fathers” be it mentors, coaches, guardians, spiritual fathers or even older friends.
So it’s high time you stopped screaming because of how your life has turned out and start swimming in these fatherly loves.
Much more fulfilling is the love that comes from our father, God, our creator.
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY
Sometime soon, I’ll write on the confusion that men of our generation are facing when it comes to identity….It’s not surprising that men are confused so much that they are starting to think about ways of getting pregnant…..obviously that is after getting married to each other.
Why all these? .... I ask….the answer I get is
“We (the men) have to help out…. In every way”
Thursday, June 07, 2007
HOSPITALITY CONTD
God has not planned for us to just take in; he’s called us to be rivers that flow out to bless others.
This week I continue on the blog on “Hospitality”.
On my last post, I started the story on a family who showed “Hospitality” to some three men that were on a mission to destroy a city called Sodom and Gomorrah.
As I said last week, one of the men stayed behind with Abraham, and the remaining two continued on their journey towards the city to destroy it. Abraham’s nephew Lot lives in this city and he was by the city gate when the men arrived in the evening and like his uncle, without know this men, he invited them into his house, to get cleaned up and even spend the night.
Surprisingly, these men said “NO” but he insisted strongly and the men decided to stay. Lot made a feast and the men (angels) are eating dinner after having had lunch with Abraham.
The reason for the destruction of this city was laid bare when later that night, the men of the city came to Lot’s house and asked him to bring the two men (angels) in his house out so they can have “sex” with them.
Lot (not knowing that the two men in his house were angels) pleaded on their behalf and even decided that he wouldn’t mind giving the men of the city his virgin daughters (daughters that he has spent his entire life bringing up in a godly way) to do to them as they wish.
Lot was taking the chance to destroy the lives of his daughters, wasting the time and energy he had used to bring them up in a godly way and even destroying his own family in the process just to save these two men.
My question to you is “what radical thing are you prepared to do to show hospitality”?
The angels took over the matter, expressed a few powers and by the next day, helped Lot and his family to escape from the city into a safe place. The angels made sure Lot was safe (“because God had mercy on him”) before they destroyed the city.
“AND THE CITY WAS DESTROYED” but “AND LOT ESCAPED”
From last week, the same lessons repeat themselves in this story.
LESSON 1: Hospitality brings about friendliness and close friendship brings about Trust. (Lot was ready to trade his daughters for the two men)
LESSON 2: Being Hospitable increases the speed of your blessings.
LESSON 3: You just don't know when God is passing by…. Treat everyone right
LESSON 4: In a mission of chaos, death and destruction came a message of life, creativity and peace.
The choice is yours.
NEXT WEEK: FATHER'S DAY SPECIAL (STAY PAGED)
Thursday, May 31, 2007
HOSPITALITY
Not too far away from Abraham lived his cousin Lot in the land called Sodom and Gomorrah.
Sodom and Gomorrah is a wicked city and the Lord decided to come down and “take them out” (destroy them). The lord came with two angels all in the form of men.
As you read through this story, bear these facts in mind
v The men are not ordinary men
v Their mission is to destroy the wicked city (Sodom and Gomorrah)
The rest of this story is well documented in biblical book of Genesis chapters 18 and 19.
What follows is the story of a family whose watch word amongst other things is “Hospitality”
Abraham was sitting outside his “house” one day (say a lovely day) and he saw three men standing by him... when he saw them, he ran to meet them, greeted them and asked if he could get them water to drink and something to eat before they continued on their journey. As you might have guessed, these three men did not hesitate. So they sat to eat under the shade of the tree.
The saying that comes to mind is
“the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”
and it turns out to be true or so…… because while they ate…. Something happened.
The men told Abraham that by that time the following year, he will be father.
Remember, these are not ordinary men; they have the power to make things happen.
After eating, they rose up to go, but one of them decided to entrust with Abraham the reason for their journey (To destroy Sodom and Gomorrah) and Abraham pleaded for the city… but it was a little too late.
LESSON 1: Hospitality brings about friendliness and close friendship brings about Trust.
LESSON 2: Being Hospitable increases the speed of your blessings.
LESSON 3: You just don't know when God is passing by…. Treat everyone right
LESSON 4: In a mission of chaos, death and destruction came a message of life, creativity and peace. The choice is yours.
Two of the men continued the journey on mission CDD (chaos, death, destruction) and when they got to Sodom and Gomorrah, another story began….. To be continued.
In the mean time “SHOW HOSPITALITY”.... It pays.
Next week Hint: It Probably is a family thing.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
I AM FREE
I am a few weeks away from finishing another stage of my academic life....my eyes firmly fixed on the coming months included in the eagerly anticipated summer break. I will do a lot of things (so I tell myself...and by God's grace I will).... but only a couple of months ago....I couldn't see beyond the next page of my books.
This is a small case compared to the reasons why some of us are not making desired progress. Limitations based on a wide range of causes and only you can know why you haven't gone further than where you are now.
Whatever the case may be, I am here to make this proclamation
I AM FREE.
Freedom
The smiling sun envisioned a new day
It’s no surprise I had no limbs
Not least ‘cos I lost ‘em
Tied they were
As good as been thrown away
The makeshift journeys… I can’t make
The lovely things… I can’t handle
Left then… stagnant like a lake
I was beaten to be humble
I was position inclined
Engagement refined
Intellectually defined
But conditionally declined
There’s a better way, I know
There’s a better way to go
Where very little counts
As I live the life I want
My hands are lifted high
My legs are fitted light
Now to say, I have the right
I’m free
Free from all those worries, free from all those mistakes.... free from all those setbacks....free from my fears.... I am free..... You can say that too.....but better put...You can live it too.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Say it more .... mean it more
This blog is about a reminder of those things that makes life worth everyday living.
The knowledge of a simple fact that you will get appreciated when you invest in someone’s life can spur you on to keep doing good.
I am not going to the deep end of getting appreciated with things like “You’re beautiful” (not everyone will tell you that)….. But let’s stay on the shallow end… with this two words ***** ***. These I believe are words that melt your heart especially when you know whoever said it meant it.
If you don’t stay the words ***** *** when it matters, you can stifle or seriously limit your chances of getting help (another time). Some argue that another time will never come…..but don’t be deceived….another time will always come.
It also tells the world of something about you …… (that you are a cocky ****/ *****)….
You actually may not be…..but how would we know?
Kudos to parents for the work they are doing in teaching their kids the habit and good practise of saying ***** ***. Its only surprising that we get so used to it and the older we grow, the more we say it and the less we possibly mean it.
As with every piece of writing, consulting literatures and other writings is always a good thing. In the course of whizzing through these pages, it’s with no doubt you can conclude and I stand to say you are right that the Bible is my best literature.
John 6:5-7 (New International Version)
5 When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” 6 He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.
7 Philip answered him, “Eight months' wages would not buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!”
Phillip was not answering the question only, in one sentence, he had said enough to bring to a halt whatever Jesus might be planning (if He is human). He said:
“Before you can embark on this project, we have to work for more than 8 months at least, so, forget about the idea and do what you know best to do – healing people” (paraphrased an emphasis mine)
The lack of background knowledge by the disciples about who Jesus is and how God operates which is traceable to His past revelations is costing them a lot in their work with Jesus. God has always been in the business of doing the impossible. He said “I am the lord, I do not change”
It means if God has always surprised humanity in doing “WHAO”….. “OH MY GOD” things (as in new things), then because He does not change, He’s still able to do things that have never been seen or experienced before.
Just to amaze you, look back at all the things you’ve seen and heard God do, from the ancient times to the most recent testimony, quite a lot isn’t?………….but He can still do newer stuff.
All Jesus needed was an input, your widows might, someone who is ready to give something and in the next verses, He is prepared to unveil one of the most effective multiplication factors in life………………THANKSGIVING
John 6: 8 - 12
Then Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up.
9 “There’s a young boy here with five barley loaves and two fish. But what good is that with this huge crowd?”
10 “Tell everyone to sit down,” Jesus said. So they all sat down on the grassy slopes. (The men alone numbered about 5,000.)
11 Then Jesus took the loaves, gave thanks to God, and distributed them to the people. Afterward he did the same with the fish. And they all ate as much as they wanted.
12 After everyone was full, Jesus told his disciples, “Now gather the leftovers, so that nothing is wasted.”
13 So they picked up the pieces and filled twelve baskets with scraps left by the people who had eaten from the five barley loaves.
That was an amazing event.
Thanksgiving is a multiplying factor of a very high degree, so if you want an unexplainable multiplication, give thanks for the little you’ve got
The questions that are to be answered includes…
Who gave you what you have?
How did you get what you have? And ultimately,
Who would you thank for what you have?
I know and believe that everything I have has been given to me by God… so I say
God I thank you……. (You should say that too)
As you make your journey through each day…. Do not forget to say “THANK YOU” to all that matters. Appreciate people’s efforts.
In doing so, you’ll be putting a smile on their faces…..you will be making yourself a target of help when you need it......and you can tell us you are not a cocky lady/fella..... thats good to know I guess.
AND WE ALL SAY "THANK YOU."
Thursday, May 10, 2007
I know I am not.... But I know "I AM"
The confirmation came at the Emirates stadium where Chelsea could not secure a victory when they played arsenal. I’m very happy for Manchester United even though I am a gunner at heart…..a gunner meaning an Arsenal fan.
Being an arsenal fan has been a little tough and endurance is needed to stay sane.
They have done brilliantly over the season, but when it matters, they have failed to get the results.
Promises of great potential, great performance, classy team, technique endowed, high work rate, but they lacked consistency and hence lack result (albeit a few).
That pretty much sums up the lives of some of us. People around us tell us how good we are (or can be)… we work hard… read wide…. and it is general knowledge that we should be doing better than how we are doing at the moment….But still, little or no result
Well…. I’ve got news for you… DON”T GIVE UP….because when you hit it…..you’ll hit it big. Roll with these lines:
Preparation + Opportunity = Performance
Performance + Consistency = Results (http://renzguy.blogspot.com/2007_01_01_archive.html)
Keep at being the best...…. if you fail at anything…..don’t fret….you’ve just learnt another way not to do that particular thing. (Thomas Edison)
For Christians out there, there is a little twist to this concern of lack of results.
Still with Arsenal: Apart from the players,….the manager and the fans can get frustrated at this lack of output or the uneven match between input and output. They put a lot in…..but get very little or nothing out. Some areas of our lives can be operating on that negative principle. It could be our relationships, finances, at work or even in the cradle of the family…..Well, I’ve got news for you too.
God, our manager, is never frustrated or fed up and will never give up on us. So if you are struggling with this same problem… you have a manager in God who is always there. He’ll see you through it all.
God told Jehoshaphat, I (God) will fight this battle for you…..and He asked Jehoshaphat to be something we see in our today world “a cheer leader”. (2 chronicle 20: 1-29). As God was in business..... The people were cheering. (amazing)
So as you make the decisions…. As you put in the effort…..as you talk the walk…..walk the talk….as you strive to be the best…be it at work….at home….to your kids…..in school…remember this:
I will be cheering you…..not just me, the whole body of Christ will be. (Hebrews 12: 1, 22-24)
Arsenal fans cheer their team (even when they are loosing) with this song amongst others “1 nil to the arsenal”. Liverpool fans are phenomenal and their catch phrase “You’ll never walk alone” spurs their team on.
Even if they don’t believe it….YOU SHOULD
God says “I’ll never leave nor forsake you” (Joshua 1:5)
Your formula will now be:
Preparation + Opportunity = Performance
Performance + Consistency + I AM (GOD) = Results + I can (You)
No matter what the result is…. You can say this:
“I know I am not …...but I know "I AM"…..so I can”
Friday, May 04, 2007
CALL TO PRAYER
Why am I saying this?
Well, you can still deliver on those things that you set out to do this year so that at the end, you won’t be ashamed to look back. (Get Cracking)
Something interesting about achieving is that you will almost all the time have to bring on board people that may or may not passionately share the same vision as you. (Keep that in mind)
As a matter of personal vision and mandate, I’m inviting you to join me in setting out a day (any of your choice) in the coming week (from any day that you get this piece) and partner me in one of my commitments this year.
YOUR TASK:
“When her mum came to tuck her in, the child looked up and asked 'Mummy, do you really love me, even when you don't have time to listen to me?'
(UCB devotional 02/04/07)
I want you to join me in praying for parents in the Christian fold and using them as a point of contact to all parents in the world.
Life is getting increasingly busy and Parents (Christian ones inclusive) do not give their children the quality time needed to teach, train and nurture them especially in God’s ways.
Let’s pray “God’s guidance and grace” for parents to help them with what it takes to raise godly children.
Let’s pray for the children that God will give them an “understanding heart”.
The following bible verses show the two sides that can result from our today practices.
“Even while these people were worshiping the LORD, they were serving their idols. To this day their children and grandchildren continue to do as their fathers did”. (2 Kings 17:41) (NIV)
“For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, so that the LORD will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him.” (Genesis 18:19) (NIV)